HUMOROUS SCRIPTS
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PLOT DESCRIPTIONS
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If you wish to order a script(s) from this catalog page, record script title(s) and identification number(s), go back to the HOME page and click ORDER FORM at the left hand side of the screen. Fill out form for immediate e-mailing or print for faxing or mailing. You may also telephone your order: (Summer) 604-925-1989 or (Winter) 760-674-1728 or e-mail lois@scriptsforschools.com.
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I-1 WHO SAID THAT?
I-1 An April Fools' Day tale. Stanley goes down to the river and meets a talking stick, rock, and fish. He runs away in horror and joins friends Sally, Alex, and Ginny. The group then meets a talking bicycle, dog, and tennis racquet. When they report these happenings to Officer Grundy, he does not believe them and is not amused. He knows it is April Fools' Day. The last laugh, however, is on us - and it happens right at the end of this story. (INTERMEDIATE) (8 Readers).
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I-5 THE KING OF THE CATS
Set along a rocky coast. A grave-digger returns home to tell of his eerie encounter with nine black cats who marched through the fog to deliver a message: "Tell Tom Toldrum that Tim Tildrum is dead. Tell him, or your life won't be worth living!" The poor grave-digger doesn't even know a Tom Toldrum. His wife and old cat listen carefully as the tension mounts. This story is a jump-tale. If read correctly, all listeners should be scared enough to "jump" at the story's end. (UPPER INTERMEDIATE) (6 Readers).
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I-8 SILLY, SILLY, SILLY
Thomas Stern is engaged to his neighbor, Mary Sillatoe, and thinks she might be the "silliest girl in the world." He goes off on a quest to find someone sillier, and does. He not only meets an old gent who is trying to plant a puppy so it will grow into a dogwood tree, but also meets a fair maiden trying to make a suit of armor from old love letters, and a lad trying to rake the moon's reflection out of a pond of water. Thomas retuns home to marry Mary, knowing there are other people in the world sillier than she. (UPPER INTERMEDIATE) (8 Readers).
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I-9 BIG BROTHER AND THE ELFIN WOMAN
A young hockey fan discovers an obnoxious elfin woman in his kitchen and decides not to tell the sprite his real name. Instead, he says he is called "Me, Myself, and I." This turns out to be a smart decision, as it saves the boy from being turned into "squash stew" by the woman's giant-like brother, and rids his house of the elfin invaders. A clever tale involving mistaken identity. (UPPER INTERMEDIATE) (7 Readers).
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I-10 CLEVER LUCY
Poor John Carver is a farmer who has a hard time feeding his? family. But John is married to Lucy, and Lucy is a mighty clever lady. With the family down to its last roasted chicken, Lucy engages in some clever mathematics and produces more than enough food to feed them all. The tale ends happily as John becomes a successful farmer - all because of Lucy's cleverness. Be prepared for a lively discussion of this tale! (UPPER INTERMEDIATE) (6 Readers).
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I-12 JACK RABBITS
The villagers of Overton all agree that something must be done about Jack Wiley and his practical joking. They like Jack, but know that Jack is "a practical joker of the worst kind, the kind who never quits!" So, while Jack is away, the entire village conspires to play a joke on him. Jack returns, the joke is pulled, and Jack walks home in his stocking feet vowing to mend his? joking ways forever. (UPPER INTERMEDIATE) (7 Readers).
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I-15 THE PRINCESS WHO TALKED TOO MUCH
Three brothers from the Kingdom of Goddado journey to the Kingdom of Yak to enter a contest in which they hope to "get the last word in a conversation" with the princess who talks too much. The two older brothers hope to win by their good looks and quick wit, while the slower-witted younger brother tags along saying, "A fella's gotta do what a fella's gotta do!" Of course the younger brother wins by simply telling the truth - as he sees it! All live happily ever after. (UPPER INTERMEDIATE) (9 Readers).
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D-13 THE FAST SKIPPIN' CACTUS POT
NORTH AMERICAN DESERT ANIMALS, PLANTS, AND WORDS FEATURED IN THIS STORY: Javelinas, Cabana, Collared Peccary, Barrel Cactus, Coyote, Mesquite Pods, barn Owl, Wash, Canyon, Pinoie, Packrat, Miden, Cactus Candy, Sahara
Another humorous re-telling of a traditional fairytale: Back in the days when "javelinas could whistle and pots could talk," a poor hungry husband and wife trade their skinny peccary for a cooking pot made from a hollowed-out barrel cactus and are finally blessed with good fortune. The magical pot skips off to find adventure, and tricks a coyote, a barn owl, and a packrat into parting with their most prized possessions.
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D-14 THE GREAT-GILA, WACKY-WOODPECKER WAR
NORTH AMERICAN DESERT ANIMALS, PLANTS, AND WORDS FEATURED IN THIS STORY: Fringed Toed Lizard, Rainforest, Ironwood Tree, Jumping Cholla, Big Horn Sheep, Coyotes, Coatis, Quail, Vultures, Owls, Red-Tailed Hawks, Mourning Doves, Thrasher, Pinyon Nuts, Saguaro Fruit, Chuckwalla
Once upon a time, a desert woman chased a fringe-toed lizard into a hole her garden. She then tried to dig him out, and dug up a pot of gold instead. Sounds simple enough, but the plot thickens as greedy kinfolk descend from far and near hoping to get their hands on the treasure. There is no solution but to declare a Great-Gila, Wacky- Woodpecker War. You've got to read this humorous re-telling of a traditional folk tale to believe it!
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CH-18. WE DON'T LIKE ARITHMETIC, Intermediate to Advanced Voice Choirs
Well, some people do, of course, but this particular choral speaking script lets the "math anxiety" folks have their say. Happily, they say it with a twinkle in their eyes and their senses of humor intact:
Fractions are atrocious, they're just a crying shame.
And who invented decimals? He prob'ly changed his name!
And then there is geometry, or much worse - algebra.
And now they've brought in metric. Well, there ought-a be a law!
The formatting features a solo voice and male and female voices speaking separately and together. 3 ½ pages in length.
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CH-21. SASQUATCH, Intermediate to Advanced Voice Choirs
Does a creature named Sasquatch or Big Foot really exist? This choral speaking script explores that question using rhythm, rhyme, and humor. Intermediate to advanced voice choirs will enjoy the challenging rhythmic pace and clever use of words:
They say it's in the forest hiding far from prying eyes.
It's greatly taller than a man and weighs in twice our size.
Its smell is strong and pungent and it's hairy - head to toe.
Which, if you've never seen it, is an awful lot to know!
The formatting features 9 solo parts and male and female voices speaking separately and together. 5 pages in length.
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CH-31/I-88 ODE TO A THANKSGIVING BRUSSEL SPROUT
So, Thanksgiving dinner means you have to eat another Brussel sprout? Ah, come on - give it a try! Listen to us read an Ode to a Thanksgiving Brussel Sprout. We may just talk you into it.
A Value-Added Package for Intermediate Readers. You receive two versions of this short, comical poem: a Readers Theater version and a Choral Speaking/Reading version.
Choral Version: ALL, ALL GIRLS, ALL BOYS, and 1 to 4 SOLO READING PARTS. 3 pages in length.
RT Version: 6 SOLO READING PARTS and "ALL" LINES THROUGHOUT. 3 1/2 pages in length.
(Not yet on the order form. To order this script, please e-mail lois@scriptsforschools.com).
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